(no subject)

It's been a long time. Too long.

I feel like my life is about to burst open and blossom. I can't even begin to explain how, or why, I feel this way. I can say a few brief things.

1) I'm turning 26 in a few short months. For some reason, this feels pivotal. 

2) I'm going back to midwifery school. I may have even found a midwife to study with. 

3) I have my little homestead. I have chickens. I have ducks. I have a calico cat. 

4) I'm going to become a licensed massage therapist. 

5) I've met a woman who lives on a commune and have made fast friends with her.

My friend Night is moving away, but rather than this being a sad event it's opened doors. She's moving to Asheville. If I finish my bachelors degree it's a toss up between finishing at Goddard in Vermont or Warren Wilson in Asheville. Asheville has many schools that interest me beyond just Warren Wilson too. I could study herbs there at their wonderful herb school. I could study massage and yoga. I could even study midwifery further at Matrona. 

I don't know which of these in particular, or if it's all this and more but I'm finding connections everywhere. Not necessary personal connections, but more like the underlying connecting element of all things. It's unfolding beautifully. 
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(no subject)

I got the job at the greenhouse !!!

I'm excited, nervous.. and I even feel a bit guilty for not being able to work as much at my regular job. What the hell. It's not like I owe it anything :P

But I expect there to be lots of flowers and herbs and houseplants in my future.

(no subject)

My boyfriend and I just finished a three day fast. I have lots of energy, although I have been getting tired earlier at night. That just means I'm waking up at a better time. Edmond says he has more mental clarity and the oiliness of his skin cleared up. I'm going to stay raw until his birthday (March 17), and I believe he is considering doing so as well. Ed is very, very lean. I would not say he's underweight really, but he is self conscious about it a bit. I do not believe fasting has led him to losing any weight. He has been careful to eat oils to compensate. Lots of avocado and nuts. I am not sure how much I lost, if any. I am not trying to compensate though since I can afford to lose some.

I bought an new juicer! It's manual and uses no electricity which means I could make fresh juice while camping if I desired. I probably WILL desire.

2 beets
4 carrots
2 in. ginger root
2 large apples

I feel like there is a blooming about to happen. I feel, that at 25, I have a very good idea of what I want with my life. I can see it within reach, even while I'm not there yet. It's comforting, and it's so inspiring.
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(no subject)

I haven't posted a real update in a very long time, and I actually feel it might be somewhat hard to get caught up on all the changes.

As I'm sure I've mentioned, we moved late last year back to the house I lived at several years earlier. The move out of the old house was hell and at the end we literally had to escape. There was no heat and the pipes had burst and there was severe flooding which actually warped the hardwood floors into waves and knocked down part of the ceiling. We were not living full time there at the time that this happened, however we were storing a few things in the house while the weather was too bad to move it. When we went to pick the stuff up is when the flooding was found, and who knows how long that water poured, poured, poured from the ceiling. It was a waterfall in there.

We are not responsible for damages (it's a long story, but even if we were, there would be no way we could be sued for this as the house would have easily been condemned had we requested an inspector BEFORE the flooding even occurred). That's not even mentioning all the crap we put up with while living there, up to and including dead animals stored in a 30 gallon trashcan on the store-side of the porch. The divider between us and the dead animals roasting in the summer sun? A wooden trellis.

But I've moved on and I don't want to dwell on this because I have MANY NEW THINGS GOING ON THAT ARE OF A POSITIVE NATURE!!!!

We have chickens! I was transforming the shed my uncle built into a chicken coop, but my dad actually ended up building me a brand new one which means I can turn the shed into a green house next year.

The breeds of chicken I have are as follows:
3 Barred Plymouth Rocks
3 White Leghorns
1 Rhode Island Red
2 Red Sex Links
1 Bantam Cochins (one hen (black), one rooster(white))
1 Old English Game Bantam rooster

Altogether I have 11 hens and 2 roosters. Both roosters are bantams so I am hoping they can only over breed the hens so much. All hens are going to be egg layers and garden assistants. I have no plans to slaughter any at this time. The roosters are protectors of the flock.

The first seven chickens were purchased in March and arrived on March 16th. The others were purchased at Tractor Supply and bought on April 14th. They're all outside in the coop now with the older ones having been out three days and the littler ones just one night. I still have to construct a run for them but I am leaning towards using the chain link dog run we dismantled from my mom's house.

I went to a workshop and made a rain barrel!! While it's large enough to last me for several days (especially right now where it's raining enough I don't have to water frequently) it is prone to overflowing each time it rains.

I have installed a lasagna styled straw based vegetable bed in the backyard. So far only in it I have peas, but I have tomatoes I started and they are ready to be transplanted soon. I didn't start many vegetables from seeds this year, so I plan to purchase most of what I'll be putting in that garden.

Fourth: Flowers
I installed a flower bed in the front of the porch. It has a circle of mammoth sunflowers surrounded by smaller Vanilla Ice sunflowers. In this bed there are asters, monarda (bee balm), echinacea, poppies, shasta daisies, and a few other flowers I forget offhand.

By the front steps I planted the Iris's I took with me from the old house. I couldn't leave them there with the house about to fall down, and with it being for sell it's destined to be razed at some point. They survived the frost with minimal damage (I couldn't plant them at an ideal time..) but they recovered and have actually sent up a stem although it's a bit late for it to bloom and it's only a quarter of the size it will be once established.

I have petunias in hanging pots from the rafters, and pansies in a hanging basic by the steps. A foxglove was planted near the iris but it's not doing so well.

I have very lofty goals for this place. I don't know how long I will live here. It's not an ideal place. I'm living in a trailer which I do not have an issue with, but I do wish it wasn't planted smack dab in the middle of the plot. When we lived here last time there was no one staying full time at the house across the valley and now there is a family living there. I worry about the sounds of the roosters crowing, yet I am considering adding guineas to my flock. The soil here is very poor and needs major amending. I would like to put a pond in for my turtle. I'd like to build an orchard. All this would take time and, as I said, I don't know how many years I'll be here.

The way I'm viewing it is that this is a learning experience. I have the ability to do the things I want and improve my skills before I have my own place.

Sometimes I feel overwhelmed on where to start with everything and get confused, but otherwise things are going much better than they were in Lexington. The only real complaint is the condition of the soil, and the distance I am from work and friends. It's 45 minutes to work, and about an hour to visit our friends. I need to reconnect with my one Bath county friend, but I haven't yet done so.
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(no subject)

On Sunday I was taking Ed to work and had plans to return home and nap before I had to head to work myself. We were running quite late; Ed has been editing a film he shot and had rendered he file overnight and was trying to get it onto my laptop so he could work on it while he waited for me, and also we needed to stop to buy gas.

Running late already, we round a turn and I see a car flipped upside down in the woods. It was down in the swamp, completely surrounded by and resting against trees. My first thought was "why is there a car body there, and why have I not noticed it before?" and then it occured to me, once I noticed the wheels were still turning, that this was an accident. And a very serious one.

I proclaimed something along the lines of "oh my god" or "oh, shit" or something, and Ed turns to me and asks what's wrong. He didn't see it at all! I threw the car into reverse, but then realized that rather than going to the accident myself, I needed to summon help. I dialed 911 on the cell phone, but we were in a very rural area with minimal signal. I could hear them only here and there, and they likewise. I drove rapidly to the nearest house, but they must have just left for church. Their dogs were outside which is the reason I thought *someone* might be home, but they were not. Ed was still trying to get a hold of 911 on my cell phone. I swore I heard screaming, but Ed says it was birds. I imagine he was right.

I immediately went to the next house and an older lady answered the door. She had about 7 kids passed out all about her living room so I imagine she must have been party-guardian the night before. I immediately told her what I had seen, and told her she had to call 911. She told me to come in and do it since I knew the details.

I called for 911 and gave the information and my name. I asked if I needed to go back to the scene and she told me since I was not involved in the accident I did not. I wanted to, but was afraid just the same. I honestly did not believe I would find someone alive in that car (it was an AWFUL-AWFUL accident...) or if they were alive, I was afraid I was going to find someone critically injured. I know basic cpr from midwifery classes, but I was not about to try to remove an injured person from an upside down automobile.

I decided I would take Ed to work and stop back on the way home since that would give the EMT's time to stablize everyone and get things going.

I dropped Ed off at his work and immediately started home. We live 40 minutes from where we work. The majority of the road is lightly traveled main roads, but are probably equalivant to back roads to everyone else who lives in less rural areas. The last 15 minutes of the 40 minutes is interstate.

By the time I had dropped him off and was halfway up the interstate towards the exit a state trooper flies by me, lights flashing. I trailed behind him, though I obviously was no where near him at the speed he was traveling.

When I arrived back at the scene the fire department was there, flares were about and a flagman stopped me. I explained I was the one who had called 911 and asked if I needed to speak to the trooper as my father had instructed me to do so after I called him to tell him the situation. The flagman did not know, so he asked a fireman who also did not know. They said the trooper would be back shortly, and I could park to the side if I wanted. I waited about 5-10 minutes and then the flagman came back and told me I could leave as 911 had my name, basically what I had been told by 911.

Everyone was solemn, and the fact I saw no ambulances concerned me. They had flipped the car over by that point, though it was still down in the swampy woods. I could see it clearly now; both front and rear windows were completely broken. The car had hit the tree head on rather than on the passenger side as my first glance when I saw it had indicated. I knew it was bad; worse than I had thought, even.

I drive on towards Goshen and I start to hear something overhead. A helicopter. I look up and see it's landing to the side of me. I knew at this point the driver was alive, though obviously cricically injured. The UVA helicopter is serious business. UVA is about 90 minutes from us, but the very serious cases are airlifted to their trauma unit as it's the best in the state.

I obviously did not take my nap. I went home and chain smoked and wondered what else I could have done.

Ironically I would later find out I knew the girl in the car. She is my seventh grade science teacher's daughter. She is about 19 years old and while I did not know her personally I do have one memory of her. One Halloween, when I was about 10, I was staying at my dad's house. I had already been trick-or-treating and had a plastic pumpkin full of candy. My dad lives far up on a hill and has no neighbors for miles and miles. He is definitely not someone who ever, ever has had children show up for candy. For whatever reason, my teacher showed up with his two children. I had to give them some of my candy as my dad had none set out for trick or treaters.

That's the one memory I have of her. It's just strange how fate works out that way.

My dad happens to have chicken pox (how weird is that, anway?!?!) and he was at the doctors today. He spoke to the nurse, told her I was the one who found the car, and asked how she was doing or if she knew anything. All she knew was she had been air lifed (I obviously knew this), and that she had to have an operation. I'm not sure what kind. A man from my town had a facebook status from the day the accident occured asking for prayers for her as they were not sure she was going to make it.

I'm hoping she can pull through.

This was the third accident I was first to arrive at. I'm not sure if this means I should become an EMT or something, but I really seem to have a knack for this. I really wish I didn't. This was by far the worse though.

I have issues with accidents anyway after my favorite uncle died in a car crash. We spent so much time at that accident scene. First to gather papers and such that had fallen from the car before we headed off to the junk yard to go through the car itself. And second when the coroner called; Dennis was missing some of his teeth.

We had to go back and search the grass for his teeth.

We found them, but the whole ordeal traumatized me.
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(no subject)

I've decided to take next semester off from school. I definitely need the break, but I really want to volunteer at least part of the time I *should* be in school. I'd rather spend my time volunteering anyway, truthfully. Hanna recommends that I go to California and work at the horse rescue she spent some time at. It's a very remote area and I'd be working alone caring for wild horses and burros. I think I'd love it, but I'm looking for a bit more human contact *this* time. I wish I had my passport.
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(no subject)

My garden is out of control. I mean out of control in a good way, though. I really need to take pictures ASAP. Its shocking to think that some of these plants came from such small transplants, and even others came from seed. I forget that, because it's hard to reconcile these huge plants with those small beginnings.
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(no subject)

I was parking at work today and there was a green SUV type automobile at the stoplight. I pull into the parking spot, am about to get out and notice this car is backing up towards me. He then motions for me to look, and gives me the middle finger for literally 30 seconds. I crack up, because it was so absurd. Then he rolls down the window and yells at me for "stealing" his parking spot, although I really had no idea he was about to park there. Maybe if he didn't drive a car so big he had to pull up to the stoplight in order to back it up? Either way, he was an older man in his 50's or so, and wearing a business suit, which made the entire situation even more absurd.